Shortcomings….

Other than my Friday Featured Authors, which I hope you are enjoying, it’s been a while since I’ve posted anything here on my blog. The reason, or one of them at least, as to why I’ve been MIA is simple. My heart. I don’t share my health issues very often, but many of you already know and that same bit of you have messaged me wondering where I’ve been. So…. I’ve been here at home, working through the notion that it’s getting worse. Much worse. The heart failure is finally starting to rear it’s ugly head in full force and cause me  more trouble than I need. But, that’s life and we all have our sad stories. While I won’t bring you down with mine, just know that each and every message I’ve received from my wonderful blogging family has meant so much. There is a slew of tests coming up, at which time I fully expect to receive the news that “we’ve done all we can do.” I say this with sadness, but we all know our bodies well. We all know when something just isn’t right and unfortunately that’s the vibe I’m getting. And after almost 12 years of dealing with heart failure, I’m acutely aware of what’s normal and what isn’t. I hope none of this is the case, but time will tell.

In the meantime, I have been steadily trying to work on Blake’s Hope. The third and final book in the series. I have a wonderful friend who has been kind enough to help me along and thank goodness, else nothing would be written! I thought I’d share a small snippet with you tonight. Hope you enjoy!

Thanks again for thinking of me!  I’ve missed you guys terribly!!!

 

I pace; the burgundy carpet with gold swirls sewn throughout rub against my bare feet. The walls are closing in with every lap and I am becoming claustrophobic. Yeah, going out is definitely a bad idea, but I need fresh air. I’ll mingle with the others and wander aimlessly about in the rain, but I won’t shield myself. No coat and no umbrella. I need to feel. And I need to forget her.

The wind howled between the buildings and through the overcrowded streets. The sidewalks were bustling with people dodging in and out of the rain while street performers were undeterred by the damp weather, carrying on with life as normal. It wasn’t. It was anything but normal. Hope’s face haunted me, whether I was wide awake or fighting to stay asleep; yet no one, not one damn person cared.

The blood pumping through my veins fueled my feet forward and warmed me under the pelting rain. Before I realized, I was running. My sneakers were pounding the pavement, sending droplets of water flying and soaking the bottoms of my jeans. I didn’t care. I kept running until my lungs hurt, but just like always, it wasn’t enough. I couldn’t outrun my last damn memory of Hope; standing there and silently begging me to help her. It was still fresh in my mind, even almost a year later.

I was about to fall down from exhaustion so I stopped briefly, cooling my body and trying to catch my breath. When I took the time to look at my surroundings, I immediately noticed there were no more bright lights and drive thru wedding chapels. The streets were void of people and the area looked like an abandoned war zone. I had run way beyond the limits of sin city and was now surrounded by a host of what appeared to be abandoned buildings; a dense fog rising among them. Where the hell was I? It was like stepping into another world.

My training kicked in as I took stock of everything, making mental notes of even the smallest details. A chain link fence with barbed wire surrounded most of the structures, all except one. I proceeded towards the one less guarded; my sneakers scraping along the broken asphalt and every lose pebble echoing in the silence. As I neared I could hear garbled voices. The faint glow of lights in the background illuminated a secret entrance hidden beside a loading dock. An unexplainable pull kept me trudging forward as my heart rate accelerated. I couldn’t pinpoint what it was, but a force greater than me insisted I get up close and personal with whatever the hell was going on.

©Kelly Miles 2016